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Netflix became my major resource for finding a
variety of television shows for my mother during the eighteen months we spent
together. Huntington’s disease didn’t affect my mother’s sense of humor, and it
didn’t take away her deductive and inductive reasoning when it came to
analyzing the news or following a crime show. That meant we could view an
assortment of television shows and movies as a way of filling our days. Eventually,
we remembered our love for The X-Files, and
together we watched every episode. The science fiction/horror/detective/comedy
mixture appealed to both of us, and we allocated two hours a day to watching
the show until we viewed the final film.
Over the last couple of months, I’ve slipped back
into the daily routine of keeping my afternoons open for reading or television.
The beginning of the summer found me outside, swinging in my tree, as I read
whatever novel caught my fancy. Then I discovered Fringe. One of my Facebook friends mentioned the show casually in a
status, advising me that I’d love the program. I lodged the title into the back
of my brain, but didn’t go out of my way to find or watch an episode until a
couple of weeks ago.
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Every morning, I hastily rush through my chores (the
house requires less and less daily maintenance as I hack away at deep cleaning
projects). Then I dash to the gym for aerobics and weights. After I get cleaned
up, I hop into the car to run errands. Usually by three o’clock each afternoon,
I settle on the couch with my favorite blanket, both dogs, some fruit and iced
tea. With controller in hand, I switch on the television to my newest passion
that mixes science fiction with horror as The Fringe Division investigates
whatever fantasy J.J. Abrams and his crew of writers can imagine.
Every day, I think of how much my mother would have
delighted in the “mad” scientist and his quirky personality. She would have sat
with me to watch these characters evolve as they maneuver through bizarre
situations, offering her astute conclusions on what’s to come next.
I find it reassuring that I can spend my days viewing
a television show that reminds me of my mother without feeling overwhelmed by
loss. I still don’t turn on Mom’s favorites (Law and Order, or Everybody
Loves Raymond), but I can discover something new that she would have loved,
and I catch myself wondering about the quips she would have made during an
episode. I miss her comments and insights; but when I surprise myself by thinking,
“Mom would’ve loved the plot on this episode,” I don’t feel sadness.
The littlest things let me know that grief slowly
shifts into the background. Turning into a Fringe
fanatic actually means I’m fine!
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Copyright 2013 Elizabeth Abrams Chapman
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